The Slimming Effect: Black & Bodysuits

Black as a slimming trick - groundbreaking, right? We're not recreating the fashion wheel here - we all know black is a go-to slimmer. I pretty much lived in black {leggings} postpartum. And even now that I'm feeling much more fit-mom-ish and less frumpy-mom-ish, I've kind of become accustomed to my black. Colorful me - accustomed to black. Motherhood does things to you.

 

 

Now, pair black with a bodysuit, and you're in the double-slimming business. In the right fabric, a bodysuit can be like a one-piece that's sucking & tucking you in all the right places. Bonus: it's not a bathing suit, and you're not on the beach feeling all sorts of body-conscious. Trust me, bodysuits {or, as they appear in my new-mom head - adult onesies} are where it's at!

 

{Oh, hey babe!}

Not quite as slimming, but equally as appealing to me these days: mom jeans. I am, afterall, a mom. Not that this stopped me from rocking high-waisted mom-jeans pre-twinlets. Rebel that I am.

 

  

Bodysuit: Tobi {size medium} // Cropped pants: Old Navy - no longer available online {check in-store!}; Super similar // Shoes: Nordstrom Rack - last season; Similar & Similar {and also, I'll trade you - because that chunkyheel!} // Sunnies: Quay Australia - no longer available {but they sometimes come back in stock!}; Similar

 

Last random thought from my recent fashion files - let's talk about Tobi. I've long shied away from buying from Tobi because - well, models be fiercely fit. Which always begged the question - how is that going to fit this shorter & stouter bod. Slowly but surely, Tobi's endless sales broke me down - and now I can officially tell you that any ol' average girl can rock it like their gorgeous amazon models.

 

 

Fabrics are quality, fit is on par, fashions are trending, AND prices are enticing. Like, annoyingly enticing. Enter my newest shopping obsession—and my latest apology, for turning you into a Tobi fiend like me. 

Top: Tobi {size small} // Pants: Anthropologie - sale, no longer available; Similar & Similar // Shoes: Oldies from god-knows-where; Similar & Similar // Head scarf: Ancient; Similar // Earrings: Francescas: Oldies; Similar & Oh-so-boho

Photo cred: Instagram & Blog Husband {Thanks, Babuh!}

XO,

Nik

Psst...more fashion obsessions: 

That 70's Style: Two ways

Cool for Culottes

Top 10 Baby Essentials for Your First Beach Trip

Fresh off the sandy-heels of our first beach trip {or trip, period} as a family of four, and I feel like I now have the knowledge {read: trials & errors} to be able to share the MUST have items for your first beach trip with babes. For comparison - ours are 6 1/2 months, teething like fiends, newbie-sitters, easily entertained, and live by a pretty strict eat/play/sleep schedule. 

Much like when we registered for our baby shower, I spent countless hours researching and asking for advice for what we would need for not just one, but two babies, for the beach. While we got a ton of helpful tips and packed the entire house {plus half of Amazon and 3/4 of Target} - in the end, these were the things we would not have survived without. 

Summer Infant Pop N' Sit 
 
The twinlets aren't quite ready for highchairs, but we also didn't want to lug/ruin the bumbos. These practical chairs fold up insanely small and have a carrying case you can throw over your shoulder. They pop open in seconds, have a tray that attaches, and can even be buckled down to chairs at a restaurant. We used these on the beach, as a highchair to feed, and to keep them contained at restaurants. Worth their weight in GOLD, but can be found for $30 at a ton of places.
 

 In real life {IRL}

Beach wagon: Mac sports collapsible wagon

When you have 87 things to carry out to the beach, trust me when I tell you that pulling this wagon {which folds up uber compact for the car} is way easier than growing extra hands.

IRL

Baby wearing: Wraps and carriers

One of the biggest things that kept me up at night was the logistics of getting the babies from point A to point B—point A being the condo, and point B being the beach. Then, a fellow twin-mom told me that the best way to transport would be for each parent to baby-wear. Genius. We were hands-free to pull the wagon, and back-free to carry the diaper bag. I went the Boba wrap route, while the hubs rocked a carrier in true Hangover fashion.

IRL

Backpack diaper bag

We have both a shoulder strap diaper bag and a backpack diaper bag, and as the twins get older I find it much easier to bring along the backpack diaper bag. Again, the theme for vaca is hands-free. You will need your hands for much more important things than hiking a diaper bag strap back up on your shoulder.

Beach essentials: Tent, hats {hers & his}, sunnies {hers & his}, SPF, baby powder 

We bought one of those baby-proof UV-protected pop-up tents for napping, but it could not withstand the light breeze on the beach. I wouldn't call it a wasted purchase, but I would call it a pointless beach addition. All you really need is tons of shade—a la tailgating tent—and a waterproof mat/giant blanket for beach naps. Other beach babe necessities: sunnies and hats {because the sun is BRIGHT to these tiny eyes and they need shade on shade on shade}, SPF {babyganics seems to be the favorite among moms these days}, and baby powder - your arsenal against sandy hands/feet/bums/bellies/cheeks...

Pack N Play

We needed two - one for each sleeping baby. We also brought crib sheets to wrap around the padding at the bottom to try and trick them into thinking it was their cozy crib. Bonus: it worked. Reality: they were likely exhausted from the stimulation of the beach that they would have slept on the kitchen table.

iPad loaded with Baby First TV

I had all of these lofty goals not to succumb to technology and to brave through tough times with sheer human entertainment. Ha! Those goals flew out the window around hour one into our screamfest car ride. Thankfully, our babes are already obsessed with VocabuLarry and his Baby First friends. The hubs and I got to face the road and ride in peace {other than the sounds of a singing parrot...}, and I was somewhat at ease knowing that at least they were learning the basic of baby vocab. {Tip: download the app AND some of the videos ahead of time, because there's no wi:fi on the open road!}

Food essentials: 6 bottles, gallon water, to-go bowl & spoon

We're formula folks, and instead of having to wash bottles after every feeding, we brought six bottles so we could make it through a whole chunk of the day without stopping to wash. We also brought gallons of purified water, because you don't want to find out the hard way {while on vacation} that your babe's tummy can't handle the city water from {insert vaca city here}. I had also picked up this handy little to-go bowl & spoon at Target a few days before our trip and it really came in handy for meals on the go! {Also suctions to the table}

Tile floor mat

Yeaaaa, I didn't actually bring this, but luckily we stayed at a condo where the owners are new parents, and they had a tile floormat on hand {insert emoji prayer hands}. Highly recommended because you never know if there will be a soft-enough space to lay your babe down, and sometimes a simple blanket just won't do. Bonus is that most of these tile mats come with a zipper bag to keep them compact for traveling!

Wine, coffee, patience & a can-do attitude 

This is for you, mama {or dad}. One of the best pieces of advice another twin-mom gave me pre-vaca was, "It's all in what you make of it." So, instead of getting frustrated or overwhelmed while trying to maneuver bab{ies}, wind, restaurant seating, food wait times, and failed plans of entertainment for the babes {giant blow-up pool fail that we won't discuss}—just take a deep breath, laugh through parenting {like you always should} and enjoy the fact that you are on your first vacation with your little one{s}! When deep breaths fail - that's when the wine and/or coffee kicks in. Also, highly suggest as many extra hands as you can get—by way of family or friends—on the first venture. Not only will they help with the 87 things you have to juggle, but they'll also be good company for the wine portion of the evening {or morning, I don't judge - as long as you're sharing.}

XO,

Nik

Psst... More on this crazy little thing called parenting:

New-mom Must Have: The Undercover Baby

  My Newest Obsession: Actual Hardcopy, Hold-in-your-hand, Pictures

To the Men of Infertility

If I had a dollar for every time I said, "you don't understand," then, well, we'd be a lot richer than I'd like to admit.

When a couple is going through infertility treatments, the empathy, concern and support is almost always geared towards the woman in the scenario. And, well - rightfully so. After all, we're the ones who are hopping up on hormones, shooting ourselves in the gut {or butt}, getting blood-draw-after-blood-draw, and bearing the weight of the guilt and pressure on our shoulders. 

But, because of those raging hormones, it's the man in the scenario who braves the storm, and really, at the end of the day - shoulders the most. The difference is, we as women get to scream about it—usually at the man—while they have to take the brunt of the hormones, all while simultaneously supporting us and our wild emotions. 

While the men of infertility may not be the ones going through the actual treatments, they are dealing with a hardship that may be even worse. He doesn't just lose his chance at a baby—he loses a piece of his wife. 

While she's consumed with emotions, he's wiping tears. While she's broken into a million pieces, he's holding you together. While she's losing hope, he's keeping both of you going. While she's losing her childhood dreams of being a mom, he's losing you. 

To my man of infertility:

Thank you for shooting me in the stomach when I was a wuss - and acting like "shot time" was always something we were both doing, instead of just me.

I'm sorry for that time I threw a picture frame at your head, when all you were trying to do was talk me off the insanity-ledge.

Thank you for the times you took off work to attend the umptheenth appointment that really had nothing to do with you - just so I could hold your hand.

You're incredible for holding back your emotions when we had a miscarriage, so that you could pick me up off the bathroom floor.

Thank you for finding 87 million different ways to say "we can do this—YOU can do this" when I wanted to give up {because you knew I didn't actually want to give up}.

I can't believe the jabs you would take, the scowls that would bounce right off of you, the "get off me's" you would push right past to hold me - all while I screamed and yelled and treated you way less than you ever deserved.

I wish that while you were busy shouldering all of my fears, anger, and heartbreak - someone was shouldering all of those things for you.

Thank you for acting like "dealing with me" while we tried to conceive for years was something you wanted to do - not something you had to do. Thank you for "dealing with me" - period.

I know that "not understanding" what I was going through was probably just as hard for you, as it was for me. I'm sure you would have given anything to understand - to be the one who could go through it, instead of me. 

I had a hunch, but I never knew that you were hurting just as bad, until you stood up there at our gender reveal and choked up while thanking everyone for supporting us for the last two and a half years. In that moment I realized how very thankful you were to not only have our babies on the way—but also to have your wife back. 

Most of all - thank you for being strong enough to keep going when I wasn't, because without you, we wouldn't have the two most perfect rainbow babies on earth.

To all men of infertility - the support, shouldering, and frames you dodge doesn't go unnoticed. Keep going, so we can <3

 

March 22, 2016 - Moments after the IUI that turned into the Cagle Twinlets <3 

XO,

Nik 

Psst...More on the dreaded world of infertility:

10 Things NOT to Say to Someone Trying to Conceive

 What They Don't Tell You About Miscarriage...When You're Still Pregnant